Beneath the Beautiful Sky of Today

I have a few thoughts on this poem I'd like to share:
The use of the verb 'claps' really acts as great onomatopoeia, and there is a strong flow that is consistent throughout the poem. I think you may benefit from some commas in the first stanza though, because it's sometimes confusing without them.

The third stanza has some interesting imagery accompanied by a great couplet leading towards the ending:

'gaining strength with each passing step
to leave forgone memories behind'

We shouldn't let our past play part in our future, past is best buried...but it's sometimes hard to leave memories behind.

I like the idea of the narrator travelling along a beach of broken dreams and memories, we should bask in today's sunshine, not yesterday's rain.

Amazing poem, It felt like a poem someone would read aloud at some sort of special occasion. It was with spirits of the other world I imagined this piece being read through in felt of.
Truly captures the peak of justice you do to poetry, poetry angels.
5/5

Luanne,

It's been quite awhile since I've commented on one of your wonderful pieces, and let me say this, it didn't disapoint. I've never been a fan of rhyme because I feel as though people just can't get the flow right when they rhyme, but you have definitly created such an elegant flow which rolled right off my tongue creating a smoothe effect. The imagery was beautiful, love entwined with nature is the essence of all beauty and I do think you made this poem seem so elegant.

The meaning behind this piece was definitly interesting, and I agree a hundred percent with what you posted about it down the bottom. The past some how nearly always seems to linger over the present, but we can only hope it removes itself from becoming our future.

I loved this lines:

And the footprints march on and on -
beneath the beautiful sky of TODAY

What an amazing way to end such a wonderful poem. Well done. -Mel

Hi Luanne, its been quite awhile here, i just wanted to comment on this piece, so beautifully written as usual, maybe I need to follow it a little more in my life. the second stanza was my fave part, truly a little masterpiece this was, and is. Timothy r

What a beautifully penned, deep and meaningful piece! Excellent rhythm and flow, void of forced rhyming. Vivid imagery and excellent use of a metaphor. Outstanding, very well worth the read! A piece many people can relate to!