Very insightful! You've really expressed your feelings well with this poem.

Poetically, it has potential. You need to check it carefully for spelling and grammar, you've mixed up alot of homophones (their/they're, to/too, etc)

Your rhyme scheme is all over the place. If you are going to rhyme, you need to try to find a consistent scheme. I'd also try to break this into stanzas, but that isn't an absolute necessity.

Again, you did very well expressing your feelings in this poem, the rest will come with time and practice.