All I Have Left Is A Broken Heart

Honestly, the title was pretty bland to me; i probably would have passed on reading it normally.

I really like the opening line, especially the "get over him" type of songs line. I would not suggest starting the sentence with the word AGAIN though. The third line sounds somewhat backwards to me. Normally, if you were speaking the line, you would speak it as so:

"Never again will I cry over you"

I think the line sounds a little awkward the way that its written. Despite the things mentioned so far, the poem is shaping up good.

Moving on, the second stanza starts out like the third line of the last stanza. Again, it sounds backwards. Normally, you would speak the line "Hundreds of tears fall (as I am) locked away in this cold room". I had to read each line twice to actually decipher the meaning, and by then, the meaning was somewhat lost. Reading on, I noticed a lot of "filler" words; such as FOR locked away / AND everyone thinks / BUT I still cant / AND I cant / BUT now your gone / So why havent / etc. These words are not adding anything to the poem and seem useless to me. I would simply remove them altogether; the lines are still good without these words.

Still reading through.

I do like some of the power words you used, like COMFORTING and PERFECT and ENDURE. This shows you have a large vocabulary and a good mentality about phrasing words together. Writing is about more than just stringing words together; its about painting a picture in the mind of the reader. You were able to show great imagery throughout the poem.

Some of the rhymes seemed a little basic to me toward the end; like MORE / FOR and SONG / STRONG. Maybe try using www.rhymer.com for ideas on rhyming words.

Overall, the poem is well written. I know that I pointed out a lot of things in my comment, but they are pretty minor in the grand scheme of writing. The meaning was clear, the emotions were honest and the flow was good.

Keep writing.

Wow..this is an awesome poem..
near perfect i must say..
although kind of sad..
u have a way with words..i enjoyed it..
keep it up. :)

This poem was very touching, I understood what the you was saying.

The theme of lost love is deviverd in a perfect rhyme

Though very poetic this would make great song lyrics

I really liked this poem. Your style of writing is great. I enjoyed reading this poem. The wording, flow, and length were all good. The emotions through out the poem were nice and strong and everything pulls the reader in. I see nothing wrong with anything in this poem. I gave it a 5/5 =)