Duct Taped Heart

by Jenni Marie   Nov 7, 2008


Smiling tenderly wrapped in each other's embrace
Planting kisses and gazing again at that beautiful face
Hearts beating in unison, we're so perfect together
Knowing ours is a fairytale love that will last forever

Staring at each other, knowing we've come a long way
For this look conveys more than words could ever say
Content to be together, no words need to be spoken
Enjoying each other's company, full of sincerity, emotion

Knowing nothing can destroy the happiness we've found
Head now resting on your chest, nooone makes a sound
Finally overcome all our problems, put them in the past
Now we're euphoric knowing our love will always last

Wait..there's wetness on my cheeks..what can that be?
Eyes slowly opening, suddenly engulfed in such misery
This duck taped heart slowly cracking at the seams
Back in hell again, and longing for that perfect dream

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Cyber Saiyan

    The title really caught my eye; I wanted to read the poem based on it.

    The first stanza is very well written; nothing to comment on.

    In the second stanza, the second line starts with another filler word. The line is great without it; I would suggest removing FOR entirely. The third line is a great thought, but I dont like the word CONTENT. This word normally used to describe something that is only somewhat satisfying; like a child wanted lunch, but was content with a snack. I think you should try a different word.

    The second line of the third stanza, "noone" should be "no one" or "nobody". The third line lost me a little as you never mentioned anything about problems in the poem until now, but suddenly they are a big issue. I really like the last line of this stanza, very powerful.

    The closing stanza is well written as well.

    Overall, the entire poem flowed well, and the wording was good.

    Good job.

  • 16 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    The flow of you rhyme is flawless and the romantic imagery stands out as the poem slowly falls to a colder reality in a very cute metaphor

  • 16 years ago

    by StonedGooberz

    I luuveed the way you used "euphoric".
    it makes me want to go write a poem with that as part of the title. also liked the way you made the poem look so happy and then turn into something close to a poetic nightmare.

    again really i dont think there is much to change here. you seem to really good with your gammer and such. much better english then what i have :)) but other then that i have enjoed reading this poem
    Raindrops 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany C

    Very good poem. I really liked it. It went from being happy and perfact to sad and painful. The imagry through out the poem was great. The rythem, wording, and length was all good. I saw nothing wrong or that needed adjustment. Very nice job, keep up the good work. I gave this poem a 5/5.

  • 16 years ago

    by xxxStarSxxx

    *crying* ohmigosh that was beautiful!
    I can relate to this sooo freaking much! Just like you can relate to mine... I'm sitting here in school reading the first three stanzas remembering all of the times i have had like those and then the third stanza comes along... just like the first line "Wait..there's wetness on my cheeks..what can that be?" I realize that I am crying... this is such a beautiful poem. Thank you for writing it.
    *adds to favorites*

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