Faded Memories Come Alive

You are totally, without a doubt, an amazing poet! The ending threw me off because that's not what I was expecting. XD

I love this poem. You are an amazing poet, Joe. I hope you keep writing. You are really good at it. I love how you put so much heart and feeling into your poetry. THis one is amazing.
=5/5=
~Bella<3

I like your opening stanza, the poem did not go where I thought it was going in the beginning, the ending actually surprised me. I like the feeling behind your words, but I think it could be a little more....I don't want to say organized, but that's what comes to mind lol You could tighten the lines a bit.

I'm not sure what the need for a comma in the first line is...
I'd think the comment would belong at the end of "and closes her eyes"; the comma after "shuts off the world" should be emitted as well.

Maybe make the words exploding "explode" and falling "fall" because ... I dunno, it just sounds better :)

When you say she sees him near, why do you also say that she wishes him near? Ohhh lol
I get it.
Desire :)
Understood!

No offense, but "this everlasting love sigh" just sounds... corny? I don't really know any other options to replace what's already there, but it just sounds... maybe a little too mushy?

Maybe instead of saying "waiting for her to fly"
could it be "begging her to fly"
or "beckoning her to fly"

Just suggestions ;)

"Fly up high upon the stars"
"Flying..." ?

Instead of "the one and only love" maybe you should make it "her..."

Just sounds better for a last line.

Overall, the poem was OKAY.
It wasn't my favorite poem, and I know it isn't the best poem on the site; it is completely understood that this poem was written for a contest, and it is a tad forced, maybe?
It's an interesting style, however.

Not the best poem, but not the worst :)
I give it a 4/5

~Stephen White

A pondering Soul,
Rests upon the moonlit sky.
She blasts her music
And closes her eyes
Shuts off the world,
Until she feels alive.

Comments: I wouldn't make any changes to this stanza, I believe that it's beautifully written. I do however think that for the beginning of a poem that there' s not enough power in it. But, it is a good first stanza, just not amazing!

Fireworks exploding in the background,
Teardrops falling from the sky.
She opens her eyes
And sees him near,
Holds out her hand
And wishes him there.

[ Fireworks explode in the background,
Teardrops fall from the sky.
She opens her eyes
And sees him near,
Holds out her and,
And wishes him there]

Comments: Last four lines I adore. First two are decent enough, I think that they kinda throw off the flow just a tad bit, though. Which is why I took out just a bit of the syllable count to make it go better.

Faded memories come alive,
Vivid images stay entwined.
This everlasting love sigh
From deep within the sky,
Must be his cry,
Waiting for her to fly.

Comments: Two last lines kinda threw me off. Along with "love sigh" I guess I get that part, but I just found it an odd way to explain it. Good stanza though. Especially the first two lines.

Last stanza: I didn't paste it because there was nothing wrong with it. Just wanted to let you know that I really liked the ending.

The entire piece is really good. I wouldn't say it's my favorite by you but it's definitely a decent poem. I did like how there wasn't an overpower in emotions, though at times it did seem it needed a bit more. I really enjoyed certain parts of each stanza, whereas others seemed a bit less catchy/emotional. I especially liked the last four lines in the second stanza. I did however like the entire poem and as I said before it's not my favorite by you but it's still a decent piece.