There were a few grammatical errors and the symbols were not needed.Other than that this was a really good poem.Basic word choices fit here well.Good work.5/5

-Amber

To tell you the truth I really see nothing wrong with this poem. I was a very sad poem about lost and pain and I could feel the emotion. I really liked this poem. I gave it a 5/5. You did do a great job with this poem.

This poem flowed well and moved my emotions deeply
5>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You have a great gift your one of the only ones on here who can make a small poem but really good

This title just captured my attention and had me curious as to what the poem was going to be about so I applaud you on an effective title. :]

Very strong opening to your poem. The flow here was just flawless without the rhymes being forced or out of place. Great choice of words and phrases such as "horrid screams" and "hardened skin." You created the scene flawlessly and I felt as if I was there experiancing it myself because you touched each one of my senses with your nice choice of words. The imagery here was just flawless. You said so much in such a short piece and that is really hard to do so great job on that!

I loved the twist at the end because I wasnt expecting it.

Well done.
*5/5* :]

Very well written.

A few things to point out. HIS SMILES sounds a little awkward; even though it isn't. It sounds like two plurals together; even when I know they are not, it still made me fumble when I read it.

MY HEART IT YEARNS sounds awkward too; either MY HEART YEARNS or OH HOW MY HEART YEARNS flows better.

WHAT IT'LL COST is confusing too. I'm not sure how to reword it, but maybe IS WHAT IT'LL COST or even PAID THE ULTIMATE COST. I'm at a loss for words on what to recommend, but it just doesn't seem to fit.

Overall, I LOVED the flow; the mix of rhyme and non-rhyme really drives home the point. I love the HARDENED SKIN line; it foreshadows a deathly image without revealing too many details.

5/5 from me. Simple, short but powerful.

Pretty decent poem, i get the picture that your watching him with the pictures layed across him. but why is he dead ? other then that im ok with it all nice piece
Raindrops 4/5