Comments : Delicate flower

  • 16 years ago

    by Bhavin

    This is a fantastic one ma'am. I guess the figure of speech used is a simile (if i m not wrong). Lovely portrayal and it makes me look at a life in a different way.

    Regards,
    Bhavin

  • 16 years ago

    by Teria

    With infinite care
    I cup my hands
    holding you within
    Soft, peachy tender leaves
    of the most delicate pink
    My beautiful rose
    Humbled by your presence
    For once lost for words *
    Your creations,
    a door to your soul **
    World of vast inner richness
    Outstretched lands
    of magic and creativeness
    My precious flower,
    So afraid to crush you
    with my thoughtless,
    careless hands
    - - - - - -
    * Instead of "For once, lost for words" I think that it would sound and go better with the poem if you made it "At once, lost for words."
    ** Your creations, a door to your soul. - I don't quite get those lines. I would like to think it makes more sense as " Your creations, a door to my soul". Where it means that what he/she does and is opens up your soul.
    - - - -

    You have a wonderful poem here. I know that for me it's hard to write friendship/love poems a lot of the time and when I can write them they're not always the best. It's like in the time of pain and sorrow I'm a better writer. But, obviously not for you. This poem is amazing. There were a few things that threw me off, which are listed above.

  • 16 years ago

    by Ingrid

    ^^ I am touched by the effort you took to comment to me but I am not changing the poem and I will tell you why:

    For once lost for words: I always have an answer to everything. I am the one who always talks, even if no one does. Michael is the first person who is able to render me speechless, just by being himself. So it was not a wrong choice of words on my part.

    Your creations, a door to your soul: Michael is the kind of man who shows his soul through his writings. I get to know him through what he writes.
    His poems are a door through which we can see who he is:)

  • 16 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    ..Now i am lost for words..this maybe the most beautiful love poem that I have ever read..I feel totally embraced by the sincerity of these words and the overwhelmed by the honesty, concentrated into such a compact poem.

    Once again, thank you so much. ((hugs))

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I really liked this poem. It was sweet. Everything about it was great. I gave it a 5/5.

  • 16 years ago

    by Grant Gilbert AKA Slash

    Wow Ingrid this is a beautifull expression of how you feel towards a man we all love very much on this site. Very well done and a well earned 5/5

    Grant

  • 16 years ago

    by Sylvia

    When I read this, the first emotions I felt were "softness, gentleness". A beautiful love poem for anyone. Excellent and it is being added to my favorites list so that I can read it over and over again. 5/5 is the most they allow or I would give you more.