Comments : Swimming Pool

  • 16 years ago

    by StandStill

    ....

    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by StandStill

    Standing at the bottom of the swimming pool
    Thinking about the air

    ^^ I like the opening. It creates a visual that's breathtaking...and it's how a lot of us feel when we look at our lives.

    But that doesn't really matter
    Wait, it matters, I just don't care

    ^^ That line really scares me. Because not only is it coming from you, it reflects how i treat a lot of the things in my life.

    Slipping down the razor
    As the razor slips down me

    ^^ The wording is beautiful, really. Just, switching it and then giving it a new meaning in the second line...creative, as always.

    The ending of the crashing sunset
    Last movement in this symphony

    ^^ It made me cry, to tell you the truth. It's a sad poem..

    5/5