I like it. I love the fallen angel aspect of it. What do you think of your new wings? :)

This was very unique, I liked it. You were very good in your description and the flow was great. keep it up 5/5

This did not suck!!!! i loved it. it was so unique and amazing!! it was written well and had a great flow and story behind it. 5/5 ggod job ~KM~

Amazing, and unique(in a good way). You have talent, keep writing <3

I think you used the word "she" too much here. There are places where you could do without it.

What stood out to me the most here was your perfect flow and flawless use of imagery. I was lured in by first stanza and was left wanting more. Very effective in getting me interested. Your rhyme was right on point here without anything seeming out of place or forced.

"The boy and the girl walk together,
Happy as can be
Until the day her father calls to her,
The one man she never again wished to see."
^this stanza threw off the flawless flow you created. I'm not sure what you intended by it but it seemed out of place.

The final stanza was a bit weak in my opinion. You started off so strong and I expected more in the ending but was just left hanging. I think if you improve the last stanza, this was be an amazing piece.

Well done.

This doesnt suck! the first few lines immediatly drew me in to keep on reading. Although i do agree with Ablissfuldreamer. Was amazing, but i think the ending stanza could be worked on a bit. But apart from that the wording flowed through perfectly and the rhyme scheme again, was very well written. 5/5