Inbetween and underneath

I dont really know how to rate this. I loved the message and the image it created. But the flow seemed skewed to me i cant really place it. (it is possible i read it wrong) but ive always believed in honesty. I would give it a 4.5 which rounds up to a 5 ^^

This is an amazing piece flowing flawlessly
The content is very profoundly complex to the point of mystery

Well done

I really enjoy this poem. I've noticed that a LOT of poet's don't use punctuation, which I'm not completely against in some cases. But, when you read a poem (especially out loud) you're suppose to pause during commas, semi-colons, colons, periods, and so on. Periods you pause just a bit more than with the rest, though. And, this poem is well written and has decent flow. But, I believe for the best flow you need punctuation. Now, I'm not talking punctuation in every line nor everywhere they're 'essayed' required but in some spots to liven up the flow a bit. I get that different readers have different views, therefore below I've pasted ONE of many ways you could put punctuation in.

Aged old eras linger through this feeble mind
Overlapping waves of sensation unwind.
Though my cold child-like hands cannot feel
The warmth in your soul when pressed against mine,
The softness of my skin can only absorb
Enough of me to believe in these obscure auras.
Barely hanging onto what is left of me.
I've lost my mind within a single leaf, you drink for tea.
And my soul rests in the ovary of your front yard tree
So, I walk with a frail body and vacant eyes,
Only able to understand people drowning in this sea
That has engulfed the entire significance
Of my existence,
And so ... I lay dormant
In the fog of your clouded head
Until the day we will be able to see through
the thick layer of tar,
dripping in between the breath
of this sea's waves
and completely coating
the truth.

- - -

Other than the flow being a TAD BIT off, I seen nothing wrong with this. To be honest the flow wasn't really off, but the whole punctuation livens it up and gives the reader suspense when they pause for that moment. Which is the only thing I love about punctuation. You've great emotion and you worded yourself flawlessly. I really enjoyed the read.