NOT WHAT I THOUGHT

That night he called me
was the night i wanted to see
his eyes sparkle in the light
& for my heart to go on a flight

that night i wished for his warm embrace
that night i wished to see his face
but I'm just another girl to him
but you see my love is not that dim

to be only in his memory and mind
his heart is what i wish to find
To be only his little friend
he's my light in the tunnel at the end

the smile on my face said it all
all i wished for was to hit the wall
the way he hugged me tight
told me i won the fight

I've just been pulled in again
pulled into more pain
for i am his little game
but i am the only one to blame

i let him into my heart
i let him be my start
to a happy life
i found all i wanted was the knife

slit my throat and hop to die
spread my wings and learn to fly
get rid of all the pain
hide my tears in the pouring rain!