Wow thats really deep!
loved every bit of it!
I think it is fine the way it is!
xo

This is a very good poem
=] I enjoyed reading it and I thought the flow worked quite well ^^

I thought that was really deep and a really good write the flow was really well done great job

tony

Laura, this is an emotional and no doubt personal piece. Life can throw at it what it wants but what we do is fight with all our strength.. I have found myself saying it a lot recently but remember it is a bad day, month, year not a bad life. I like how you set this out in a letter, great touch.

1: I like the first line here, the imagery of life being like walking on burning coal shows that life is not what you expected it to be but then again is it for any of us because even though the Royals have things on a plate they would not have expected what they have I guess. Also, lying on a bed of nails as you try to sleep, ouch.

2: When life seems to throw heartache and pain at us continuously it is hard to comprehend But life goes on and sunshine always comes after the rain, no matter how long its rained for.
Typo on Exsept it is spelt except.

3: I guess we can beg and plead for a day off from the pain but it will only come once it is good and ready. I am always told that life only gives us what we are strong enough to deal with so you must be a strong person.

5: Like this as when we awake in periods of darkness we all ask the same question, why?

6: Grief is always hard to bear especially when it is a loved one and one we hold dear taken before us even if they are elderly hurts like hell more so when all we want is our life to end because of everything it's thrown at us.

7: Here we have it the self destruction that so many people turn to in times of hardship's whether it be drugs, drink or self harm.

8: Powerful ending.

A great wrote with unforced rhyme.
All the best, Em