Realization upon my own self

The more I sit alone
the more thoughts come into my head
some horrible
some insightful
they give me headaches
make my mind go every where
from anger to depression
from joyful to who knows what

Is it the thought of you being away?
or the thought of a sudden change?

I do not know
yet I still have them,
the only thing to do is wait....

Realize the wrongs I've made
The rights i want to make
whom i was going to become
who i can become,
Though I have some regrets
try to not dwell on them
but move on to a better path
controlling myself
until my ending days
so whether I'm down
whether I'm happy
i know my mind will always have questions
always have different thoughts
I know I'll make it as long as I fight my fears
I'll last!

So for the many tears i spill
for the many laughs i have
I keep you on my mind
as well my family
bettering myself to become some one who can make a change,
I wasn't stupid
only lost with in
I realized my wrongs
realized hateful is not the way to live
thanks to my girlfriend ,my family,and everybody who cares
my life shall no longer be dark
but a quest to a new path
so for all the hateful thoughts i have
I'm not listening
only seeking happiness!