My Body

This piece is one that I can fully relate to. I'm a cutter myself. Or rather an ex cutter. I remember the pain it caused for me and other's that lived with me. Blood stained carpet's and bruises and ripped jean's. I can recall it all like it was just yesterday when in reality it was more than over a year ago. It's agonizing to think of the heartache that ensued after i did the deed. Always I felt so relieved when doing it and calm a bit after. But no matter how long the relief was. There was a never ending pain that always recycled itself. I thought myself a burden to man kind. And always wanted to prove that i could deal with any pain that hit me. I deemed everyone else more important more valuable than myself. It killed my nerves and my posture started to change. I walked with no susceptibility and a major lack of confidence. I hid my face under pounds of makeup and mascara. Started to become something I despised. A disturbed teenager with less than a inch of feeling. I lost control of all my emotions and perceptiveness. I thought tranquility only came from pain. The danger I was put in sent a jolt of thrill through my body. I had power over the person that mattered at the time. Me. It was excillerating and I almost felt like it was a constant overdose. A drug that was caused by natural body prescriptions. I had my own antidote. The loneliness was a fresh wound that split open every day. It sound's like an addiction. That's because it was. Whenever i saw the blood I shivered in pleasure. I knew that I was doing this. No one else could slice me as deep or hurt me as much. It was a burden and a nuisance. Eventually it swallowed me whole. I stopped doing everything besides self harm. It consumed my mind and my body was like a work of art that scared everyone else but me. I know how it feel's to want to prove to everyone that you control yourself. It's always been a constant fight to gain power over all that you should own up to. I can honestly say I have bad habits still. But cutting was the lead and beginning to it all. Inner turmoil eats away at the mind. It can cause a sickness that can eat you alive and kill you. Believe me when I say. Your heart may get broken and dissolve before your eyes. But your spirit should never be taken away nor your self esteem. The future looks bleak. But if you long for a better life. Make it happen. Don't let heartache indulge it's hunger on your brain. A heart can easily be revitalized. But if you lose yourself completely it takes years possibly decade's to
gain some prospect of happiness back.
This write was simply sad. Yet it tugged at my heart. I feel your pain and have experienced it. I share your pain. It's an every day struggle. The things that gets me by is quite simple in itself. I help other's. It makes me feel good. And more at ease. To divulge in other's same heartache. It's a breath of fresh air. Because I know I'm not alone like I thought. Beautiful piece. Share your feeling's with me if you have no one else. I can give you a few stories and home remedies.
Great work.

5/5

-Lilium

YOur Really good.!
and well that image is so sad.makes me wanna cry . エ guess people can relater.
keep it upp
p.s ii live in n.y 2!
p.p.s my dad didn't die . just tried to look through the eyes of someone who`s did.

I really like this piece. The words you chose were simple, but put so much emotion into the poem. And I can definitely relate to everything you've written. You have talentt. Can't wait to read more from you. ((: Great write, great read. 5/5

Nice work i know what it feels like to want to cut keep it up

I'm not really a fan of dark poems but this has certainly broght my attention.I like how you portray the girl cutting herself with the razor. you have certainly placed a gore image on the readers.It just give me the chills of you planning to go on another 999 cuts.Thought it was a bloody read, I think you have penned it down nicely.Keep it ip 5/5