Mint Flavoured (Sijo)

by Ashleigh Skye   Dec 17, 2008


Your love lies melted in sticky puddles, scattered on my flesh,
unable to wash away it stays, ingrained in my skin
but in time it shall be replaced, by a better flavour.

©
PLEASE COMMENT AND VOTE THANKS A LOT

*Sijo-a poetry type consisting of 3 lines. Each line contains 14-16 syllables each. A pause breaks each line in the middle. The last half of the final line is usually shorter than the rest, and contains no fewer than 5 syllables. The first line introduces a problem, the second develops it, and the third is a resolution. Sijo is a type of poetry that is meant to be sung.*

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Tom Swart

    I liked the simplicity of this work of yours and found it refreshing - it quenched my poets thirst. nicely done! very well worded

  • 15 years ago

    by Teria

    I absolutely adored reading this poem. You did an outstanding job writing it!

    'sticky puddles', 'ingrained in my skin', and 'scattered on my flesh'
    ^^ Such vivid imagery, kudos for such word usage.

    'but in time it shall be replaced, by a better flavour'
    - Though I don't believe the comma should be there, it's such an amazing ending to such a short, yet sweet and emotional poem.

    The emotional boundaries set in this poem are amazing, followed by the imagery and the flow you've put through-out. It also seems you did a swell job with keeping the syllable count intact (:

  • 15 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Beautiful piece that has such meaning. I really love the form you wrote it in, and you wrote this poem perfectly! Great work, take care and keep writing...

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