Im not

I'm not supposed to love you
I'm not supposed to care
I'm not supposed to live my life
Wishing you were there
I'm not supposed to look
As you walk by
I'm not supposed to tear up
I'm not supposed to cry
I'm not supposed to wonder
If you think of me too
I'm not supposed to wake up
Every morning just for you
I'm not supposed to talk
Or even wave hi
I'm not supposed to regret
When I have to say goodbye
I'm not supposed to write
All these poems and quotes
I'm not supposed to attempt
To write you any notes
I'm not supposed to fall
As hard as you made me
I'm not supposed to dress up
Hoping you will see
I'm not supposed to pretend
To impress you like I do
I'm not supposed to change myself
To make you love me too
I'm not supposed to have this feeling
That never goes away
I'm not supposed to get on my knees
And try to make you stay
I'm not supposed to talk you into it
Like all the times before
I'm not supposed to be this selfish
Cause it affects you more
I'm not supposed to try so hard
For you to admit how you feel
I'm not supposed to wake up from my dreams
Wishing they were real
I'm not supposed to have this feeling
Deep inside my chest
I'm not supposed to give you my all
Or even try my best
I'm not supposed to save you
Like you need someone to
I'm not supposed to give up
Just cause I'm scared to love you