My hero

Lester Wayne Berlin

He is a man full of courage and strength. When I look at him I know that he has done everything in his power to be on this Earth today. He promised himself and everybody around him that he would be here to watch his baby girls grow up, and he was. He fulfilled his promise.

Lester is a man full of wisdom. When I look at him I know that he has had a life full of knowledge. He is opinionated and stubborn; I guess that's where I get it from. He makes me smile when I look at him because I know that I am a part of him. I'm proud to be a part of him.

Lester is able to change your mood by saying one simple thing. His laugh can brighten up a room because it is so different. And when he laughs so hard that his eyes go little, it makes my heart skip a little beat. Knowing that he is happy for those moments makes me happy. Knowing that he gets the chance to laugh makes me happy. Everybody needs to laugh.

He looks so positively at the world. He believes in himself just as much as he believes in his family. He knows the difference between right and wrong and he admits when he is wrong. He has a heart. He is able to sit in a room full of darkness and hold you while you cry. He is able to be a man but at the same time he is man enough to be able to cry.

He believes that sharing his experiences with you will change what you believe. He has gone through so much and more. All he wants is for everyone to be okay. His only wish in life is for his girls to be happy and his wife to be happy. Honestly, all he wants is for things to fit perfectly together sometimes. Even though he knows that they cannot.

Day after day I thank god for making Lester Wayne Berlin my father. I thank him for being able to find my mother and fall in love. And I thank god that they are still in love. I thank god every day because he granted my family the wish and prayer of keeping him on this Earth.

I remember when Carmen and I were little, he would always make sure that we were sitting on his knee, smiling. He wanted us to be healthy. He loved to watch us enjoy our childhoods. When we were younger my dad was sick, but that didn't stop him from making sure that we lived our lives to the fullest the same time he tried to live his. He swore to god that he would make it for us and he did make it for us.

When we used to go camping with the family and the Shiplacks, I remember that my dad loved to swim with us. He would take all of us girls and boys in the water with him and he'd let us swim on his back. I think that was our favorite part, when we got the chance to swim on his back. Or, when Carmen and I would be playing in the living room, he would be our horse. He would buck us around. Every time he did that we would laugh and scream with excitement.

We were the happiest kids in the world when we were younger because we had the parents that we did. They were there through everything with us and they still are. My dad always made the funniest comments about everything. There were barely any moments where he was serious. I think that's why people knew him so well, because he was so outgoing, happy and excited about everything.

My dad loved his job. He loved to paint and he loved to create. At times we would barely see him at the house because he would be over in the "shack" spending his time building things. There was always something new that he would be making over at the shop, but he never liked to tell anybody until he was finished.

Carmen and I used to love going over to the shop and hanging out with our parents because that meant that we got to play cards. I remember that Carmen would shuffle the cards with the face up and I always got mad at her for doing that. I thought that she was cheating, when really it didn't matter what way you shuffle the cards because it's not like you can put them in any certain order anyways.

My dad always said, one day I'm going to get you two boxing gloves. He said this because Carmen and I used to fight a lot. We would argue about anything and everything in order to be right. In the end we would laugh about it, and as I sit here and write this I laugh because I know we both got most of our stubbornness from our father, the other parts are from our mother, because oh boy, watch out.

My dad was the only man that I have ever met and probably ever will meet that can swear so much in one sentence. Everybody knows him for that so it isn't offensive to anybody - at least I don't think so! His normal conversations each day would consist of the f-word as every second word he said.

When Carmen and I would make up our games in the back yard of our old house, we would make our dad play. He was always running with us, throwing the baseball around with us or kicking the ball around with us. Either way he always made sure that he did things with us. He didn't take his time with us for granted. I know that for a fact because when he looks at us you can see pride. And I know that he's proud that he helped raise us.

I remember the day that my dad was diagnosed with cancer for the second time. I knew from day one that things were going to be okay, because when I looked at him I could see the strength in his eyes and in his heart. He was so strong throughout the entire thing, almost two years! He made it look so easy, with the strength he had. He believed that everything was going to be okay, no matter what happened and where life took him. He knew that something was waiting for him, but he didn't know what it was.

I remember the day my dad told me that he was scared to die. He didn't want to die. And, still, through all the struggles and tears, he was strong. He cried in my arms and I cried in his arms, and still, I believed in him. He fought for us when we were babies, and he made it! He made it and he watched us grow into young ladies. I guess God doesn't grant everyone more than one Miracle, but he granted my dad a Miracle to live and see us grow. And he got his wish, his dream.

Now, December 15, 2008, my father's legs stopped working. He has no strength left in his arms to move. He does not talk very often because he cannot. He does not reply to you when you ask him a question, only sometimes. And still, again and again, throughout the struggles and the tears, I can still see the strength in his eyes. Maybe he doesn't have the strength in his body, but he has the strength in his eyes; and maybe now, he isn't scared to die. He's allowing himself to go to Heaven. We don't know when God will call him home, but we know that everything is going to be okay. Because, even though he won't be here with us, his soul will linger on forever and he will always be with us in our hearts.

My life will not be the same without him; it will be far from perfect. But I know, one day we will meet up again. I don't want it to be too soon, daddy. I want to live my life with the strength you gave me, and I want to live my life to the fullest to make you proud. You will have grandbabies and you will hear the words Grandpa; because you will be listening to us, from Heaven. My babies will know everything about you one day, I will tell them of the strength you had. You are my hero.

You never gave up on yourself, even when your body did. You never gave up on us, on our family. You still knew what love was even when your body could not work; and even though it was hard, you told us you loved us every single day. I saw the strength in your eyes, and today, on the 15th of December, I still see the strength in your eyes. Until your very last day here, down on Earth, I will see the strength in your eyes. I believe in you, I have hope in you, I trust in you, I see the courage you have in yourself and in the world. You are remarkable. You are my HERO.

R.I.P Daddy

October 3, 1943 - December 19, 2008