If I could change the subject
I wish I never would have met him
The change in my life wasn't drastic,
But I could've dealt without the change.
A time when I wasn't forgiving,
But forgetting wasn't a word in my vocabulary.
I was treated unfairly,
But I too, treated without care
It was as if we were both never there
A presence
Yes.
A body.
Heart, mind and soul
A myth.
If I could change the subject
I wish I never would have met him
I don't like being alone, you said
I never told you this, but I don't either,
But I don't hate it.
And to be you,
Oh, it must have been hard to be you
I would do things you'll never understand
But you would do things I couldn't stand
And as hard as that was
I was afraid.
If I could change the subject
I wish I never would have met him
It's as if time flew by
No breath was taken
No photography they said
It will only make the pain last longer
And I couldn't have said it better myself
For you to know that though,
It's like you planned this
An untimely meet between the two of us
I want to start over,
But with you not here
Nor there....
If I could change the subject
I wish I never would have met him
Too long ago we had this
And now more than a year has gone by
But for you to forget about it
Makes my whole body quake from inside
I think the thing I hate most about you
Is myself.
The way that I felt.
A sadness I'd shut in
With my fear,
And my doubt.
If I could change the subject
I wish I never would have met you
If I said I forgive you
Would you come back?
If I said I've forgotten you
Would you make sure I have?
I don't like being alone, I said.
I guess you've forgotten that,
But you didn't make sure,
That I had.