Comments : Look what he's done

  • 15 years ago

    by Alicia

    Very nice read, you expressed your emotions extremely well!
    If I might recommend one thing,

    "but her crystal rain
    fall's as hard as she did
    for a boy
    who she had forbid"

    This stanza is a little choppy, maybe you could try and add a few words to make it flow just a little better.
    But still amazing work!
    5/5