by Brittney Follett Jan 6, 2009
category :
Sadness, depression /
lost relationships
Sweet serenity caressed by rays of sunshine. |
An absoluetly flawless piece. You portrayed such emotions that made the reader feel what you were feeling. This piece is very heartfelt and the word you used set the scene perfectly. The wording you wrote was very deep and meaningful, and this was a heartbreaking but wonderful write to read. 5/5 from me, a masterpiece.....Take care, keep writing, always and forever... |
Well, I really don't have much to say for this one. I don't really have any suggestions for you to improve.. I thought this piece was flawless and the word choice chosen fit the emotions and feelings you portrayed perfectly. What a great piece youve written here although with sad emotions. I loved the last line how you said love has destroyed us all, the word choice was superb, destroyed caught my eye.. although I felt as though maybe demolished would be more effective here. You did a wonderful job though, I'm literally speechless, your word choice is simple yet brings across the sadness that you were trying to inject into this piece. |