Songs We Sang.

by forevertobeart   Jan 11, 2009


We all have something to loose,
and what is left from that we choose?
Picking up words from random spaces,
decorating the wind around our faces.
We smile at strangers and they smile back,
both sides staring at frames they've cracked.
Jingles of rain remind us of a pain;
forgotten blood floods up the brain.
Songs we sang when we were young,
lay scattered in dust, have been long unsung.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Teria

    "both sides staring at the pies in stack."
    - I do NOT like the use of 'pies in stack'. I thought at first you meant 'piles'. Though I can see how pies somehow could oddly enough work out here, I don't like it. Others might. I don't like it because it takes attention away from the poem and settles it on that specific word. I guess I settled on it specificly because I didn't like the usage of it, haha. Maybe you did mean to use 'piles' maybe not, either way I don't like the usage of pies in that line, haha.

    Other than that one thing, I absolutely adored this poem. You had other words that made me go 'wow' But it was a good wow. More phrases than words, such as; 'jingles of rain', 'decorating the wind', and 'forgotten blood floods up the brain'. You did a very nice job putting this poem together. With nice, vivid imagery. Unimaginable similes/metaphors and great word usage.

    Kudos for the poem, kudos galore (;

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