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I guess this isn't really a poem...writing is my form of coping so I just had to get it out. Why do people always go back to someone they know will just hurt them again? And why can't people look past themselves and see what their actions do to others?
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Shes a lone pillar of strength
trying to hold her world together,
determined to make it on her own
and yet needing someone so very much
she doesn't feel whole alone.
She's the one I look up to
even when shes down on her knees,
she's such a part of me
people swear we were meant to be twins,
we're the image of each other.
Every time things go wrong
and she cries herself to sleep
my heart breaks over and over again
because there's nothing I can do
but tell her I'm here and I love her.
I don't know why she does it to herself,
putting herself through the pain over and over again
telling herself and everyone else
that he's different and he's changed
and taking him into her life again.
Every time ends a little worse
but as soon as she sees his face again
the fear and her sense goes out the door
and she thinks her dream is reality again,
it scares me so much.
I've seen her cry and seen her bleed,
seen the bruises on her skin
that she tries so hard to forget,
why can't she walk away
instead of give in every time.
With each time he comes back in her life
the precious sister I love so much seems to disappear
and I don't know the woman in her place,
she throws everyone else's feelings aside
because she knows they don't agree.
I listen to her cry and scream,
promise me she won't do it again
because she knows he's not a good man
but then she has a weak moment
and says she misses him so much.
We both know the man she loves
is only a dream and not who he is
but she says she wants her family back
and opens up the door
and the cycle starts all over again.
It breaks my heart and scares me so much
because I know one of these days I could loose her,
I've come so very close,
I try to swallow the tears
and be there and support her just the same.
What do you do when you can't say a thing,
if you do then she'll just block you out,
I'd rather deal with the fear and pain
then not be there when she needs me,
it just hurts me so much.
