Not Ready For Goodbye

Running down the long and narrow ice white hallway
Tears fill my hazy eyes; this cannot be your last day
Scanning the empty rooms for the one that holds you
Knowing you are unstable, there's nothing I can do

Blink back the water that is streaming from my eyes
Strength is needed, so it's time to wear my disguise
My outside reads a smile full of strength and hope
My inside screams a story of one who can't cope

The stiff, firm doctor emerges, it can't be good news
I feel my stomach sink, not ready for his long reviews
'We have to wait and see if she makes it through the night,
Where there is a will there is a way, she won't give up the fight'

Sitting by her bedside, staring intently into thin air
Memories playing in my head are too much for me to bear
People come and go as the hours pass on by
Ready for her to wake, not for a goodbye

I drift off to a fragile sleep, unable to face reality
My mind isn't ready to hear about my mother's fatality
I get woken by a slight tap on my hand, I look up in disbelief
My mum's warm smile greets me as I sigh in utter relief

**I know this is not the best written poem, but i have been trying to write about this for a very long time and just really had to get it out**