I am....

I am monstrous
I am horrid
I am all things
awful and ugly

I have soiled this friendship of ours
I have filled it with rotten thoughts
I have broken the unbreakable bond
of the life we once had

I never thought I would do this
I never thought I could
I never thought I should choose this path
and go down the road of no return

I was selfish
I was rude
I was what I always hated
and now I pay the price