I remember

I remember
the first time I heard you say the word forever
All I could do was laugh

I remember
the first time the thought of forever crossed my mind
I was watching you smile
And when you asked what I was thinking
I could only smile too

I remember
The first time we talked of forever
We were sitting on the steps of your empty house
We talked for hours of how great it would be if it were us moving to a new home together
And how much we wished that day would hurry up and come

I remember
The first time forever seemed like a reality
When that pink line appeared on the stick before me
You told me we weren't ready and I knew you were right
I cried for days anyways
Inside I couldn't help thinking what a happy family we would have made

I remember
The first time I realized how long forever was
Your words rang in my ears
From a another round of fighting
And I thought to myself that I could never live everyday like this
No matter how much you meant to me

I remember
The first time I knew I didn't want you in my forever
How guilty I felt
How I could see in your eyes that you already had our life planned out
I just needed to get away

I remember
The first time I learnt the truth about forever
How shocked I was by the realization
That even if you weren't by my side
You would never leave my heart

I remember
The first time I faced a forever of missing you
All I could was hold onto the memories