Imperfection of the Rose

by SashaMirage   Jan 26, 2009


I'm hiding this depression
Making it fade and disappear
This is my final confession
Although trembling with fear

My voice is one of sadness?
I'll bring the tone up a notch
Pretending to be made of happiness
Faking laughter as they watch

Tears fall like rain
Irrigating the seed
From the root to the stem
sadness I bleed

Each petal made of beauty
Because kissed by the sun
Named for perfection
Chosen as number one

But then grew a thorn
A sign of imperfection
Although sweet and lovely
Received much rejection

Trust starts wilting
Stem begins to bend
And so I learn the art
Of how to pretend

Petals slowly close
Receiving no more rain
I once had believed
You could heal my pain

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Kylead

    I liked it alot and just remeber only you can change your position in life no man can do that for you...

  • 15 years ago

    by Heba

    Oh wow sasha.It was a nice piece and I felt that this is the same thing that I do...hiding your sadness behind those fake smiles...
    Inshallah sis everything is going to be fine and good again...

    well done.5\5..

  • 15 years ago

    by Hollymariee

    Because kissed by the sun

    This is one line that really stood out because it doesn't really make sense .. But I really love the last staza . It's really easy to picture your writting . The flow is really good , except for in a couple spots its a little off . There were alot of places that I found should have punctuation .. But that's up to you . 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Mister 47

    "Trust starts wilting" i thin there is something wrong in the last word i think , forgive me if i am not but maybe it si "waiting".

    the last stanza hit me like a thunder i love it .

    roses , petales and thorns, god made the roses sacha this way , beautifull , lovely , extraordinary to watch , and made the thorns too , soo the bad men that want to hurt that rose know they will be hurt .

    thorns are not bad thing . everyone have throns . just i hope you dont have scars, these are the hard one to heal ..

    lovely poem , your rhyming , .. jsut perfect words asmooth easy and simple ... i would say keep your syllables count in order a bit but that did not affect the poem much

    you still have my vote 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Faithless

    Well certainly i don't see any imperfections here only perfection is the word which describes this poem.I like the way you used the rose a metaphor to describe how you feel about urself.You have penned it down beautifully.

    But then grew a thorn
    A sign of imperfection
    Although sweet and lovely
    I recieved much rejection

    ^^ I like how you describe the thorn of a rose as the flaws...itz realli very imaginative of you

    Excellent Job

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