Comments : Insideout

  • 15 years ago

    by Mister 47

    Insideout , i mean wow , this si original masterpiece ,

    ^_^

    opposit feelings and words and situations , all rhyming and merging perfectly , i think in a way it tell the reality of a girl m when you say bye and you mean helo and you hold the hand but please let go ,

    i mean i wil never understand girls ^_^

    i loved those lines ,it is just made me smile in a night like thisa nd it si going to my favorite

    waht do you expcet less then 5 ?
    ^_^

  • 15 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    "You see blue and I see green.
    You see nice and I see mean.
    Tell me yes, I'll tell you no.
    Tell me stop, I'll tell you go."
    `I love how this stanza ties in so perfectly with the title.. when you think of Insideout you think of opposite.. which you did right here.. what a unique beginning Jen! :]

    "My inner self, my outer being.
    What I know and what I'm seeing.
    How I feel and what I show.
    When I say bye and mean hello."
    `I love this poem, how unique is this. Again, you continue with the opposite thing, and the flow here is flawless.. your rhyme is unbelievable.

    "Take me here, no take me there.
    Keep the silence and let it blare.
    Feel the strength within my weakness.
    See the colors, soak in the bleakness."
    `Your word choice here is amazing.. soak was beautifully inserted. I must say I really love how you are making the flow of this poem so smooth, the rhyme is not forced at all and all the words are combining together amazingly and making perfect sense. Wonderfully written.

    "Life and death. Truths and lies.
    Staying close. Cutting ties.
    Hold my hand, but please let go.
    Lift me high, but keep me low."
    `Wonderful! A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! I wish I had the ability to rhyme my poems and still hold a clear meaning and have a great flow without having the rhyme be forced.. Ahh, you have talent I wish I had. :/ Well done here, I'm speechless.

    "Tell me an old that is new.
    Turning myself into you.
    I'm letting go and yet I'm here.
    Now you see me. Dissapear*
    ` *speechlesss.*

    Wow, this was a really unique piece, and I enjoyed it very much. Your title couldnt have been more perfect, and it really drew me in and made me want to read.

    Flawlessly written!
    5/5.