by Frozen hearT Jan 29, 2009
category :
Sadness, depression /
about depression
Grubby clouds blemish minds |
by The Queen
The idea at first was very intensed and i must agree with Cass about the ending. It made the poem somehow incomplete. Also, the word "sharpness" i think is to be revised.The repetition of lines of structure, in script in black and the word "fable" i dont think was necessary. (Still, this poem is better compare to the others ive read here.)Other than that, i think the original idea of the poem was amazing. 1st and 2nd stanzas were outstanding. |