I love how you used questions in this write. It makes the reader stop and contemplate the answers, actually think. An excellent read. 5/5

How Eternity Looks Like

Will the wind carry my voice
across thousand miles?
And, while you sleep,
caressing your ruffled hair,
will it whisper the tale -
of silent promises
stranded outside your door?

^The wind carrying your voice a thousand miles, yes I think so. As long as you speak, it will carry your words to others. The wind does ruffle your hair and at times it does seems as if it is whispering if we listen to those "Silent promises stranded outside your door".

Will forever end
with 'revolution and rotations'
or demise of last spec in cosmos?
Is it Long enough
to suffice my love ?

^We all speak of "forever" but like you ask, how long is forever. Will there be wars or black holes in the universe that will destroy the world. I think that death is the thing that ends "forever" but we don't know if there is life after death so perhaps forever would continue on.

Moon mocks my loneliness,
sneering along
with his favorite star,
and I wonder,Is
night more darker
or my stooping shadow?

^Loneliness can be intensified by a bright moon lit night and it could seem as if the moon and stars were mocking you. I am not sure that the night is darker than shadows unless there is no moon and stars, then perhaps it would be.

sailing on our dreamboats,
will it embrace the shore?
and if it capsize,
would we discover our own island?

^This verse is my favorite. "Sailing on dreamboats" brings forth an image of a boat sailing through the clouds and what would we find it if capsizes. In our dreams, it could be an island or it could just be miles and miles of water, it could be anything we want since it is our dreams.

They say love is Eternal.

but,
how Eternity looks like?
Will I ever know?

^What does eternity look like? Is it ever a tangible thing that we can touch and feel and see or is it simply a state of mind each of us has? A question that each of us must ask and answer for ourselves.

Raj
What a sad heartfelt piece.

Will the wind carry my voice
across thousand miles?
And, while you sleep,
caressing your ruffled hair,
will it whisper the tale -
of silent promises
stranded outside your door?

I feel you trying to send your love and thoughts to someone who is very far away.....not sure if your loving thoughts are making it that far.

You did a great job on this!
Love Cindy

A beautifully penned verse....It is indeed hard to grasp what love really is...
I love how you pondered upon it and shared it with us:)

Hugs,

5/5 Ingrid

I really enjoyed reading your poems, especially this one. Each time you ask a question, lots of thoughts kept running through my mind, but the beauty of it is It a rhetorical question. I am certain that the wind carried your voice a thousand miles because your words touches my heart. Sad yet beautiful. You know sometimes distance doesn't hinder a thing, and i'm sure your words touches the one you wrote this poem for.
Iam happy to have a friend like you. Very well done.5/5, kel.

I like how you have beautifully crafted this this poem. The choice of words that you have chosen really help enhance the poem and enables me to visualize what you try to depict. You imaginary is truly fantastic and it was sucha delghtful poem to read. I love how you end ur poem with those questions hanging

Excellent Job
5/5

Very nice free flow the unusual wording is within the limits of poetic lisense

This poem is unique in it's structure. You usued long stanzas at first, and then wrote in shorter ones. I liked the choosing of words in this piece, but there weren't many rhymes. The flow was a bit off from here to there because of this.

The poem itself wasn't bad at all, the idea and feelings expressed were deep. 4/5

A very excellent piece of poetry, I greatly enjoyed reading this poem, and got lost in your words and the meaning beyond it.

"with his favorite star,
and I wonder,Is
night more darker"

There should be a space after the "," in the second line. But otherwise this was a greatly penned piece with much flowing emotions. Nice work, 5/5 from me, take care!

A very thought provoking piece. flow was a little off, but i like it a lot all the same. i keep reading it over and over trying to figure out the answers. lol. somthing tells me it will take a while. thanks for sharing. all the best ben thompson

I really liked it!! This poem is creative with your chioce of wording adding more depth to the piece =] All of your stanzas are well written and the flow worked very well. Excellent job, this is a very nice piece

An interesting write for me. The flow was good, but could of been better I felt. I liked your choice of words and how you portraited such great imagery through out. I didn't like the structure of this poem however, the stanzas where of all different lengths.

First stanza was 7 lines long, second stanza was 5 lines long, third stanza was 6 lines long, etc.

Overall a great write, keep up the great work!

Peace, Joe

A really good write from you! I love the questions you asked in this poem, so many of them i have wondered my self sometimes.

Moon mocks my lonliness,
sneering along
with his favorite star,
and I wonder,Is
night more darker
or my stooping shadow?

^^ I dont know what it is about that stanza, but i really like it. It is very creative and i love how you used the moon and his favourite star. Very original.

Great work!
5/5

"Will the wind carry my voice
across thousand miles?
And, while you sleep,
caressing your ruffled hair,
will it whisper the tale -
of silent promises
stranded outside your door?"

^^ I really like these opening lines, the imagery you portrayed here is beautifully done and creates vivid pictures in my mind while the flow is perfect and hooks me into the piece.

"Will forever end
with 'revolution and rotations'
or demise of last spec in cosmos?
Is it Long enough
to suffice my love ?"

^^I'm finding this piece to become better and better throughout, with each line stronger than the last, and I love the emotion and depth within these lines.

"Moon mocks my lonliness,
sneering along
with his favorite star,
and I wonder,Is
night more darker
or my stooping shadow?

sailing on our dreamboats,
will it embrace the shore?
and if it capsize,
would we discover our own island?"

^^Favourite lines of the piece so far. Powerful, hardhitting, beautiful imagery and so much emotion that's it's almost overwhelming, with each line read I can feel my heart dropping a little more.

"They say love is Eternal.

but,
how Eternity looks like?
Will I ever know? "

^^What a beautiful way to wrap this piece up, bittersweet, moving and touching, really tugs on the reader's heartstrings while the emotion here is incredible.

Beautiful writing.

Yet another great piece from you, outstanding poem.

sailing on our dreamboats,
will it embrace the shore?
and if it capsize,
would we discover our own island?

my fav stanza

all the best and take care