I liked this piece. I thought it was very sincere and human. I think this feeling comes from the use of 'God' at the beginning of each stanza. The one thing I though could’ve been better was the last line. Instead of it reading ‘God punishes us all with my life.' I think it would be better if it continued from the previous line, reading 'As to punishes us all with my life.', but it’s nothing terribly important, I just think it sounds better. I liked your structuring, and your rhymes. They were very complimentary. Good job.

Brad

I love this poem very much i might be one of the few to truly understand how hard it is to live hear and to know how had you want to be with god if you want ill talk about it more in messeges but i love this one very much