You just described exactly how I'm feeling. It's a lovely poem.

Tabi,

This poem rocked, sweetheart.
It had great flow, good wording and a really, really strong message: this girl is on to you! HA HA HA!
I loved it, it's shows so much character and spunk:)

*hugs*

5/5 Ingrid

This was an amazing poem. I enjoyed it very much. Such emotions and just packed full of energy like nothing I've read in a while I was captivated the entire time. Great job I look forward to seeing more.

Rebbeca

Excellent write with vivid imagery. I enjoyed this read, your choice of wording was fantastic. Your word choice was striking and original. I found that the poem was successful in it's length, you held my attention throughout the whole piece, any longer and it would maybe, be incomprehendable.

Overall a wonderful write, keep up the good work.

Peace, Joe

Another amazing poem! This one is actually going under the list of my "favourite poems".. I know exactly what you are gong through and i can defenitely relate!

These are my favourite parts:
"You know, when the devil tempts you, you don't always have to partake."

and

"Come on, we both know you're not going to give me my fairy tale."

I really love this contempary easy read. As far as I am concerned the flow could not be better

It's an alright poem, but at many times throughout you appear to be trying to hard. Your emotions are there, but they are lost in words that are too complicated for the emotion. Simple is beautiful Thank you

Peace and prosperity,

(RKD)

That was quite powerful although it would be more powerful if you ended it like you stating of not wanting him anymore, which is just my thought nevertheless this piece already is rocking. Flows perfectly with a decent rhyming. I also liked how you managed to focus on the idea that your poem was trying to emphasize. Good job..

Quit looking at me with that spontaneously playful expression!
Each time you do, my mind is flooded with unanswered questions.
Why must you keep fiddling and fumbling with me till I break?
You know, when the devil tempts you, you don't always have to partake.

^I Love the first 2 stanzals here. sumtimes we say we dnt care what ppl think or what they show on their faces but times we do. n it hurts like a fudger... n i love how you opened ur poem here. nice flow indeed

Seductive promises of protection flowing from your deceiving lips.
Purely captivating lines recited from your diligently practiced scripts.
Enchanting possibilities my mind knows are inevitable to fade away.
Silly heart, why in the world would you think he would actually stay?

^Nice!!! i wouldnt change a word here. powerful message. fake promises nice. has many can relate to this part. i surly can. flow is still good

When am I going to realize it's just that the time was wrong?
When am I going to recognize all my feelings will never get along?
How can you look at me as if I'm just another entertaining project?
How can you yell at me so passionately, turn around and kiss my neck?

^amazing job here. deep and powerful indeed. words are simple but yet a great meanin in them. i lubit it. =]

You stand there tripping me only to encounter the chance to rescue me.
Leaning in ever so closely only so you can whisper what you saw on tv.
Picking a fight over something trivial so you can smile and say whatever.
Wow, after that I must admit that you are actually quite clever.

^a bit sad n a bit of wanting n needing. it reminded me of what ppl do to get to you. i actually like this part. one of my favorite so far. lubit it as well.

Attempting to manipulate my feelings or at least make them go numb.
Can someone please tell me where irrational emotions come from?
Please just stop caressing your arms around my waist like you care.
Come on, we both know you're not going to give me my fairy tale.

^awww... the emotions were right here in this piece. very imagie. i love it. love the way you ended it indeed. i wouldnt change a word here. beautiful. keep it up!!

Take CaRe,
Frenchy

I enjoyed the poem alot.
I almost want to rip this guys head off. I hate it when people say stupid things just to get people to fight with them, and then make you feel like complet crap afterwords. I can not only feel your anger, but its slightly empathic. very tangible emotions and utterly complexed way of looking at the situation, i know you know what is rational to do, but irrational emotions, from what i get from your poem, are telling you to stay for some strang reason

Wow, that was great. The flow was good, but was a little off in a few places. Like in the first stanza, last two lines. The rhyming was okay, but again, it was a little off. The emotion was amazing. I like the questions in the third stanza, but the rhyming is a little off and the flow isn't quite there. But I really like it when poems have questions in them. It leaves the reader wondering. The last stanza has amazing emotion. But I just wish you would've made a better rhyme. good write.

Soda E>

Great.. this is... i cant even describe it. it hurts. but guys just know how to play very well.. theres now way of knowing sometimes.
but somehow we have to keep our heart from breaking.
5/5
amazing
<3
Tania