Break her

by abi   Mar 17, 2009


The broken heart,
lying there in bits,
it was screaming for you,
reaching out for your kiss.

A swinging brick,
is what she swore,
until she realized,
she could not take anymore.

She hurt you bad,
and that she knew,
she kept on apologizing,
each day through.

But you built her up,
only to crash her down,
the girl that always smiled,
now only wears a drained frown.

Her pain was unbearable,
she curled up in a ball,
breaking down crying,
she just lay on the floor.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Em

    Very powerful, well done. 5/5, Em

  • 15 years ago

    by XxTwisteDxxMinDxX

    I really like this one. but in the last stanza:

    Her pain was unbearable,
    she curled up in a ball,
    breaking down crying,
    she just lay on the floor.

    "ball" and "floor" doesnt rhyme.
    at the end of the rest of the stanzas they rhyme. might wanna change that. hmmm. idk what to tho.

    but other than that good job. =]

    will you check out some of mine some time and tell me what you think. i'd greatly appreciate some constructive critism =]

  • 15 years ago

    by abi

    I used drained as it fits in with her just melting into the floor with her tears

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