Comments : Nature's Lullabies. (Collab)

  • 15 years ago

    by Sylvia

    Bravo to both of you. The descriptions you used of nature's sounds are brilliant. Excellent job. 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Temps!

    Thank you so much for doing this with me.
    I think we made magic together:)
    I would love to do this again some day soon!

    *hugs*

    5/5 ( for your part) Ingrid

  • 15 years ago

    by Lu

    You have both created a beautiful read that touches the sense.

    The imagery created was soft and peacefully pleasing to the mind.

    Well done both of you, very much enjoyed the read

    Luanne

  • 15 years ago

    by Faithless

    Ocean, your waves kiss the shore, then withdraw
    with the moon as a conductor of your reassuring rhythm.
    How many sailors fell asleep throughout the ages,
    lulled by the sound of your mighty voice?

    ^^^ what a beautiful opening here.I like how the both of
    you capture the essence of nature.I think the 2nd line
    stood out most for me. I aslo like the question pose
    in the 3rd line.Great job here

    Wind, blowing at ever-changing speeds and angles
    through chimes and leaves, making them sing.
    Soft winds, rippling the waters, murmuring waves.
    Severe storms, creating a cacophony of sounds.

    ^^^The description of the the wind in this stanza is
    fantastic... it's as if i can feel the wind brushed
    against me and i also like the how you used the word
    cocophony in the last line

    Birds, flying gracefully tasting the refreshing breeze,
    chirping melodies as they flap their gorgeous wings.
    Competing fiercely with one another to be the loudest,
    their high pitched voices echo and can be heard miles away.

    ^^^From wind to birds... i like the transition made here.
    Though simple words were used here, but the way it was
    conjoint together simply captured how nature works

    Twisting and twirling like a maze in mid air
    buzzing bees sit upon flowers, slurping away pollen...
    As the sun sets in violet hues crickets scatter all about,
    causing chatter throughout the rest of the evening

    ^^^This ending is absolutely fantastic.The imaginary
    here was brilliant.I can so relate to the 3rd and last line
    hearing the sound crickets when night falls.

    I must say overall you guys did an excellent job. Seriously
    its impossible to tell whose line was whose. I can see that
    the both of you have plan and conceptualize to made this
    poem a Great Masterpiece.

    5/5 from me