Zephyrs Melody (2nd)

Amazin'.. such emotion and it shows so well nd it just draws you in never wantin to stop readin.. the words you can imagine as a scene playsin in yur head.. you did great work and a very good job.. keep it up.. you hav a talent..

I like the repetition in this piece. You have to put it in the right place to make it work and I think you have done that. It almost seems like a formed poem. The repition makes the rhythm catchy. Good imagery!

Well I was drawn in by the title and I was glad that the poem didn't dissapoint me. I must say that this poem is well structured and was portrayed beautifully.I like the idea of how you repeatly used the 'Or is it zephyrs melody' on every stanza. It kindda work for me. Overall you have done a Fantastic Job. Keep it up

5/5 from me

Awaiting dawns shadows..
Or is it zephyrs melody
concealing the burning butterfly
Caught inside its sweet grasp
Lilting the night to last forever

A piece of poetry so profound, in tune with 'zeyphr's melody', nibbling upon the soul's silence. Though is poem is melancholy,
it is beautiful. 5/5