Land of Insanity

This was another good poem. The flow of the poem was good and the emotion was good. The poem was short but you were able to make it go straight to the point. Good job.

First of all, I've got to say I loved the title. It's what drew me to this poem. I've always liked using that word in poems. Haha.

Its all there,
-- Hmm, I'm really not sure if that's a good opening line.. It seems kind of dull and doesn't make the reader excited to read the rest.

Actually, I think it's all just a little plain until you get to:

The complexity is consuming,

that line. I loved that line, but I don't know why you didn't make the others just as interesting. It's like you're just telling the reader what's happening instead of showing them. Maybe you could use more descriptions or metaphors.

Here is just an example of what you could do it may not be exactly what you're going for.. but it's just an example:

Screaming whispers,
it's all there,
itching in my head,
telling what I should belive,
with no reason why.

That's just me though, I like the descriptions and stuff. If you don't then that's fine. :] Write however you feel it needs to be written, because it's your poem, and you shouldn't change it just because someone else thinks it should be written another way.

To a land of insanity.
-- I love this last line. I think it's what makes the whole poem. :]

Keep writing!

Cayce

This one was good. I think you could have done alot more with the topic...insnaity is a hard one to cover..it could have been a lot creepier. Keep it up. Shanik