Prose
by StandStill Apr 19, 2009
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I met a boy who spent the wee hours of his weekends high off of ecstasy. He said to me, "I'm gonna be a star, sunshine, and burn out brighter than anything you've ever seen" and for half of a bloody instant, I believed him. He had doe eyes that made me cry for his innocence and I wanted to believe he was a dream. Couldn't be anymore real than the wisps of smoke I was seeing in my two AM peripherals. For half of a second, I loved him. |
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15 years ago
by Sylvia
Powerful words you have written.
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15 years ago
"He had doe eyes that made me cry for his innocence and I wanted to believe he was a dream."
^ I thought this was a beautiful line, you have penned a great piece here.
"it'll kill you someday is flickering like a cheap motel light bulb til you eventually spark and die. What the hell's the point if you're always going to be a soggy, dead thing, lying at the bottom of a pool where you cannot breathe the air."
^Great description and observation, it is what so many of us choose to do and sadly sometimes we don't even see it.
I told him to find a better way to burn.
He told me to burn in hell.
Sometimes, I think that that's all life really is. Flickering in this deadened space, crawling and scrunching along like the dying slugs we are. Sometimes, I think it all really is a goddam hell. But that would be too poetic for this life.
It's all just burning up inside of me.
^I would have been just as happy without the final line because i think the one before it was also a great ending, but I can't fault you because it was just great, a true pleasure to read, a serious subject with some whimsical undertones and good descriptions. Nice work.
