Painful memories of you and me

Maybe one day you'll understand the way I felt,
Upon a dusty, hard, cold ground I knelt.
Maybe one day you'll realize how much love I shared,
Through oceans and deserts my love once stretched.

Maybe one day you'll realize what you meant to me,
As clouds gathered to chain me when I was free.
Sometimes I wonder why you were the one,
You weren't extraordinary nor did we have fun.

So why did I fall in love with someone that spat upon all feelings I gave,
Shoved me deep down drowning beneath each wave.

Tell me dear does it make you a better man,
To know that you made me cry so much I could no longer stand,
Your name to be uttered upon my lips,
You stripped every petal of joy and slashed me with loveless whips.

Tell me why I cannot cease to think of what we had,
Constantly dwelling back to the happiness once shared.
Tell me why I'm still thinking about you as every second passes by,
Why these tears drop down my cheeks as I cannot control the urge not to cry.

Tell me God what wrong did I do,
Why did he break my heart so badly that every day old scar seems new.
Tell me how do I face this life when I'm broken inside,
Hurt and drowning as I try and find a place to hide.

These tears and memories that never once leave,
In the depths on my heart and mind they continually weave,
The untold story of pieces scattered and blown away by the fiercest wind,
Who needs anyone in life when the one you love turns out to be your greatest fiend.

I loved you more than what I could hold within my own heart,
But you blackened every feeling I had and washed everything apart.
And yet I'm still here - still in your life.
What the hell am I still doing being a part of your life.

I wish I knew the answers to everything that's changed,
I wish I knew of a place that didn't seem this strange.
How I wish I knew what to do with this pain that's left me grounded,
With no dreams in my eyes or faith within surrounded.

I wish I could make a new life with the broken pieces that lay upon the ground,
Find a way out with magical words and ways that will astound.
I wish I could seek the revenge my heart so dearly craves,
To watch you bleed upon the ground with wounds that make you no less brave.

I wish I could do so much more than rip my own heart from my chest,
Wake up every morning and not detest,
The life that God gave me that was once filled with bliss beyond eyes could see,
All that remains now are "painful memories of you and me".