The pain can be felt in these word you have expressed in this write...may your heart once agin find peace.

sadaddy

Suoer awsome poem. i just put one up yesterday like this. it is a chilling thing, spirits and demons. but my father was a satanist and mother was a witch, so i have a bit a background with it. well, loved the poem. 5/5

I liked it I wish you would of kept on going!

Alright this was good, the feeling of being captured took over the reader but I think you could have elaborated more. By adding and going into more detail you will find out that it makes a big difference. This is a good start, I have faith in you that it can turn into something greater.

My last suggestion is to go through what you have so far and add comma's where needed. Sometimes you skipped the natural pauses and reading it felt forced.

God bless you and Merry Christmas!

~MaryAnne

Why not start living your dreams instead of dreaming them?