Righteous Warrior (Trolaan style Contest)

I liked it... definetly have something going here... i really like how the whole thing was tied up in the end... awesome

This is a great poem. The first stanza though was abit off and did not quite exploit the title. The second line in the first stanza disrupted the flow. "what if it Iam being asinine" i think you should lose the "it" part. The style you did is challenging but you pulled it out. The choice of words was good, not too simple and not too complicated. You should check on the general flow of your poem, it flows really well in most of the stanzas but what i suggest is that you have a second look at the first stanza. Generally, i loved reading this piece. Brilliant write.

Writing to meet a deadline
When will this time slow?
What if it I'm being asinine
Who made it happen do you know?

*I love rheotrical questions :) they make me think. Nice*

Righteous warrior fighting for the heart
Realized he'd been beat by the soft rain
Rain would burn his skin ripping it apart
Regret is the only thing that replaced the pain

*I love this. It gets more personal than the first stanza. Love the diction and the imagery as well*

Ignorance had become his ally in this journey
Igniting his flame that had been so tamed
Incognito was his sense of justice and yearning
It'd be himself that he had to blame

*Wow...I feel kinda slow. I just realized all of the lines in each stanza start with the same letter..that's so cool. I'm gonna have to try that some time. It's very effective and clever on your part.*

Greatness is what the common man had received
Glutton had replaced his request for revenge
Guaranteed he'd lost his soul while completing this deed
Ghosts of his past is what await him in the end

*What a spooky ending. Love this poem. The flow and the style work together to create a very interesting story. Nice work. Your poem are never a disappointment. Nik*

The poem has met the challenge of this style and delivered its meaning without any forced rhyme

excellent!