Breaking down

As I lay in my bed, I stare at the ceiling
Waiting and wishing for this pain to descend
Many regrets, and so many fears
My eternal nightmares, will they ever end?

My past haunts me, while my future runs away
I thought there was so much there for me
Such agony, and distress leaves me feeling discouraged

Isolating my thoughts and emotions from my mind
While my smile makes the illusion that I�m content
So sick and tired of running and hiding from comfort
I know that�s what I need, but there is no one who truly listens

Now as I look out the window into the slightly cloudy sky
I stare straight faced, I feel nonexistent, valueless
Feelings are no longer there, I�ve gone dull

My body is slowing designating, and leaving nothing behind
I�ve become careless, I just don�t care anymore
My effort has become zero, and reasons have become multiple

Such problems and pain are causing a major build up
I�ve built my self a mask to cover up the feeling of being broken
Sooner or later, I will fall, and the mask will break