by Obscura
This is a good poem the structure is well built the rythem is smooth but there are other things you should change like half way through the poem the periods stopped you need to put some more in and it was not ended with one also because you put a swear word in it -it has to be put into the expilict catagory i can understand why you put it in this one but you can get in trouble if you do not have it in the right one |