by Rachelle Jun 13, 2009
category :
Love, romance /
i love you
I love you for giving your heart to me and trusting me with your pride |
Okay first of all, I don't like the repetition of 'I love you' There are way too many filler words eg. and, of, for, etc. as well as too many, I, me, your...I felt like that was the whole poem. Try rewording a little and make it a little more original, it seemed very cliched to me. 'Thoght' is spelt 'thought' and 'cuz' should be spelt 'cause or because. Overall this was just okay, it needs a lot of work in my opinion. |