Five and a Half years.

You see me smiling, happy and bright
Hoping you can't see through the facade,
At least, not now, not for tonight

The laugher that escapes my lips
Sounds so real to you, if only you knew
Practice makes perfect, this is just a game.

Indifference is the mask I try to master
You can't know how much this is hurting me,
I won't allow you to see the truth

I can't force you to be where you don't want to be
And it hurts to know that you don't want to be,
Standing right here beside me

You keep me here, unknowing,
My undivided attention placed on you
Promising you I'll be somewhere I know I can't

Though, I'll be there, hiding behind this wall
I created to keep you, alone, out
Seeing you under those lights, guitar in hand

I'll try and hide the pain, I know will burn in my eyes
It makes me weak just to think
Just to imagine the way you'll be that night

No one understands, time will heal the wounds
But without you, I am not whole
I'll chase everything that I think may help

They'll be hurting just the same as I
I am a heartbreaker, all because heart breakerart to give
You took it years ago

So tell me, if five and a half years isn't enough to heal
To forget the way you once looked at me
And the way you still do when you let your guard down

When do I get to feel whole, when will this pain fade?