Summer rain stains my eyelashes, as I run from another haunting image
The dog days of summer are far away still, and I feel life creeping up on me,
as I count the days until I get to hold you again
Everything falls back the way it used to be, everything but you and I
I can feel your voice getting slower and dreary
and it's really starting to scare me to death
Remember back before we knew what love was?
And I would stay up late on weekends, just to search for a reason or two
I wish I knew what I meant when I promised you forever,
but even I can say, that truthfully, I don't know what I want
I don't know if I'll still be with you a week from now, let alone next year
Summer stretches this filthy, coroded heart extra thin,
compared to the calming metal days of January
I can only be there for so long
I can't stay forever
April dragged by with bloodshot tears and trembling hands
I lost sleep over the millions of nightmares that life was throwing my way,
and all I remember is that warm Friday morning when I needed some kind of hope
and you held me in your arms, letting my soggy tears airdry on your shoulder
You didn't even mind that my eyes were naked; without make-up or the usual mask
that I find myself constantly reapplying to hide behind
You loved me for who I was
May came in a flourish but I was still feeling weak in the knees
The hospital visits were multiplying, and it seemed that things just weren't getting brighter
You tried your best, forcing a laugh or two out of me,
but it was the words and verses that stuck
We began to reach a height of a new kind, exploring new kinds of
kisses and hugs and all the above
But I still painted myself in stitches and regret so thick,
that our conversations became constant, but never changing
For me, the girl of change, I felt trapped and claustrophic
everytime I was in the mere presence of you
But you saw me as something special
You loved me no matter what I said, or did
June comes up, slowly but surely, along with a reinvented me
Suddenly I was feeling more and more like almost seventeen
then I ever had a month ago
Your eyes became weak and powerless, as I felt myself growing
Up and past your young barely sixteen
We said goodbye to the hospital, but I began to say hello to rewinded
previews of last summer, when he broke my heart in a trillion tiny pieces
and threw all the self-proclaimed blame to me
But at least this time, I had you, and I was able to breathe perfectly
The days creep by, and I find myself missing your desert sand skin,
euphoric kisses and calming hugs and I'm desperately
counting the days in two's, three's, and sometime's twenties
You said you would hold me, and never let go
