Teenage Condition

*A bit out of my style here... but we'll see.

alarm buzzes into groggy mind
tired but energetic a maelstrom of emotion
exploding outward from the inside
the reflection in the mirror is false
calm eyes cover deeper tension and worry
somedays i cry for no reason
others my laughter is infectious
chemical creations within me awaken
mix that with screamo music and spaghettios
my face feels made of plastic
can't express what i'm feeling
no words may be used this is unspeakable
then crack; a crash course in falling apart
reckless display of emotion
care for anyones reaction abandoned
we are helpless prisoners in this warfare
joined in bitter agony and new feelings
adults are the sworn enemy
for in this drugged and deranged mind
we find them to be clueless to our pain
the war is heavy these days
both sides claim victory while losing
and neither knows what they're fighting for
we struggle to see the invisible
i grasp blindly at cold nothingness
we are all addicted to something
or someone that we think
eases our pain
so withdrawal hits hard in the morning
waking up with oreos for company
lying has become easy along with false masks
there are no answers yet many questions
heartbeats and the drone of the radio collide
this fear and confusion came locked tightly
within my chest
there is no escape from myself
no ability to run away from life or memories
yet as low as it gets the highs are just as extreme
breathless with adrenaline, laughing insanely
finding solace in others as insane as you
an exhausted breakdown follows
and then fall back into cycle

the alarm is buzzing.