Frozen and wide-eyed, I stare down the hole.
Part of me wanting to fall.
My head says to run where all will be safe,
but I make no movement at all.
As the minutes pass by and the sun overhead
comes closer to where I could dive,
My shadows grow, too, in beckoning slowness,
In tandem with testing my pride.
The blackenss beneath was embracing my fears;
the questions proving too much:
"How far will I fall?" "Will it hurt when I land?"
"Will I survive this looming, fast rush?"
I stare at my shadows still growing; no pause
and roll with my eyes in defeat.
My heart starts its pounding; a magnet at best
as i start in my counting to three.
"One" I say softly, yet trembling in fear,
Reality clutching my throat.
I sneak in a breath; anxiety building.
My mind is still telling me, "No!"
I'm flooded by memories and thoughts from my past
and more easily voice, now, a "Two"
because all my memories comfort me now...
my memories were all based on you...
Anticipation gnaws at my mind;
a future is all I can see.
Now, staring wide-eyed, your face in my eyes,
I shout in my blinded love, "THREE!"
