Twelve years have gone by,
how the years go by quickly.
I did not know
when I turned six years old
that a couple of weeks later
my life would stop
my past memories would be forgotten
my mind would get lost
in the depths of darkness.
I would be left alone
to find my way home
but I was not the only one there
now they have moved on, or so I say
I was so young
yet I understood what was happening
erasing all the happy memories
and leaving the sad ones behind
although I really can not remember
the full day of those days
small parts are still lingering
but i was not the only one
who was broken by this
She, her path was lost in her eyes
you were her inspiration
and the day it happened
it disappeared
for the other, She, I do not know
for them , it was way beyond devastating
knowing it would happen, sooner or later
they moved on, recovered, and forgot, or so I say
I was still in the same spot
A little girl not knowing at first
trying to go through that white door
and dark interior
candles lit and people gathered
But a hand held me back
and embraced me
it was my grandmother
and my two sisters beside me
In line to see her
my sister in the back of me
or was it my mother?
Her face and hands so cold, like death
and that scent that will never be forgotten
People crying, a coffin lowered
screaming and crying
a small bucket with dirt being passed around
I took some dirt into my small hand and said in my mind
"If only you did not die"
dropping the dirt onto the coffin which was inside the ground
After that......nothing
I can not remember
my past, which is my past-future
It would never be remembered
but forgotten
