Comments : A perfect picture.

  • 15 years ago

    by physco

    This is well sad,
    excellent work though :)

  • 15 years ago

    by Mushh

    :) thankyou

  • 15 years ago

    by physco

    Don't thank me chick, just keep up the good work :)

  • 15 years ago

    by physco

    Don't thank me chick, just keep up the good work :)

  • 14 years ago

    by Steady Stereotype

    Wow. I understand that this likely makes no sense seeing as how this poem was about, but I thought it seemed amazingly cute.

    I mean, you think of a little girl, and she simply wants to draw a picture. But then this picture she's about to draw becomes grotesque, almost like seeing the poem and the words as a child rapidly growing. Through experience and pain. Well, maybe it doesn't start as a little girl, but the poem does start off with a softer touch. Like the person reading it would begin softly, before screaming the last words at whoever is willing to listen.

    Though I think the flow in the end was strange, like it was rushed into its closure. Keep the four line structure and the rhyme scheme? I think that would have been better.

  • 14 years ago

    by No1ButMe

    This is very well written, although it feels like it's not finished. Its sad but it doesn't feel like your whole point is there. maybe play with it a lil bit more and see what comes to you. but i did like it. 5/5 and ty for taking the time to read and comment on my work it means a lot to me.

    Svandyke

  • 14 years ago

    by My Name Is Mouse

    I like this poem best. It's easy written, and the words aren't forced. Keep writing, I'm looking forward to reading more.

    Mouse.