A crowned and wasted queen

Baby, it sings
through these egg shell walls
the drowning voice of my
cottonballs.
_______________________________________________________________________________

my eyes used to be
the color of coffee,
but now they match the tiles, they are
easy.
my tongue used to tie
pink knots in your mind,
but now it shaped these words
easy.
my lips used to speak
cruel words about existing,
but now they slur so
easy.
my pen used to write
sweet rhymes while i wasn't thinking,
but now it runs a track
from your 6-string to my a**;
i'm so f**king
easy.

(why can't you just drop your pants and)
kiss me
with your eyes
that match the
sunrise, or
taste me
with that tongue
that makes me feel so
young,
or
tempt me with those lips
that force me to my knees, or
scar me
with that pen..
or i'll scar myself again
BECAUSE
each time you ignored me, i
gave my thighs a slice
and each time you ignored me, i
downed the pills and closed my eyes
and each time you ignored me, i
pulled my hair until the scalp bled,
because,
each time you see me bleeding,
you're hot and ready to
( ) me again.

and when we're done, you dress and
kiss me, then leave me to my own
so i slice until you adore me again..
i slice.
then soak up the juice with cottonballs
mop up the blood
from my kisses that
sing to you through these empty walls.