Last night was so hard for me,
The love of my life wanted to die
And yet I had to stay strong,
No matter how badly I wanted to cry.
It breaks my heart to see her that way,
It tears my heart in half,
It makes my heart rip in two,
When she cuts and then just laughs..
To see the love of your life,
Begging for you to let her go,
It hurts so bad but you gotta try hard,
To not let your hurt or pain show
I cut so deep to avoid my life..
But I don't wanna cut no more.
I just want her to be okay,
But I feel like im running against a wall.
She begged me and begged me!
To let her die in my arms!
But I couldn't I wouldn't!
It set off all types of alarms..
What if I slept?
And she tried to leave?
Cut all her veins..
And leave me to greave?
What if she used my tablets to OD?
And I woke up and thought she was okay..
But hours later she'd still be asleep,
And then I'd find out it was her final day?
What if she found rope?
Hung it from the roof somewhere?
And when I awoke and I couldn't find her..
I'd find her limp body hanging above a chair!
All these things went throught my head,
When she was begging me to let her give in..
But I stayed strong for her, kept a straight face..
Gave her my blade.. instead of throwin it in the bin.
She asked me to kill her,
Help her leave this life,
I put my hands on her throat..
Twas like being stabbed by a knife!
I realised what id done.
And all I wanted was death,
I hated myself for it!
I didn't deserve another breath!
I rolled over quick,
Tried to hide all my tears,
She's wanted this for months!
Losing me is her only fear..
I asked her if she wanted to be like him?
To leave me all alone?
She thinks im strong enough to survive this..
But I can't be on my own!
Im terrified of myself!
Terrified of what id do!
Scared of being by myself!
Knowing what you said was true..
Im not strong enough to lose you!
Not strong enough to survive.
If you were ever to leave me,
I'd no longer be alive..
I will not try to make it through.
I will not try to live.
I will not promise you I will survive.
Because if your gone,
my life will have nothing else to give.
If you're going to die...
Im sorry you can't be infront of me..
It'd be to me like giving you permission,
If you die, I die, that day we both will leave
I love you with everything I got!
And I know that you know it too..
I just wish that you could give it time!
I promise baby, we will pull through...
